Because love alone is not sufficient, in order to cultivate a strong relationship, there must be six elements:
Psychology of love, love maintenance techniques, and relationship dynamics.
Table of Contents
ToggleBecause love alone is not enough! Besides ‘love,’ what does a good relationship entail?
Today, Bangkok Matching, Thailand’s high-end matchmaking company, brings up an interesting topic regarding the psychology of love and lack thereof in relationships. Regardless of how long some couples have been together, even for decades, the roots can be severed swiftly, leaving hearts broken. Despite the primary reason for individuals committing to a relationship, often being ‘love,’ why does the powerful word ‘love’ lose its influence when it comes to separation?
That’s because being together as husband and wife, living life together, involves much more than just the word ‘love’ itself. It can be said that love is not everything; it is merely something that brings two people together, makes them feel good about each other, and prompts them to develop a relationship. However, afterwards, love must transform into mutual understanding, acceptance, openness, broadening perspectives, and adjusting attitudes. While this might seem simple, if it were as easy as many think, the divorce rate in Thailand over the past three years wouldn’t be as high.
The statistics of past relationship endings among Thais serve as strong evidence, confirming that adapting to each other after the initial spark of love has faded is a matter of living together. It’s a matter of ‘one-half can manage, but the other half must yield to these things.’
The divorce rate in Thailand from the year 2021 to 2023, as found by the Department of Provincial Administration:
- In the year 2021, there were 110,942 divorces nationwide.
- In the year 2022, there were 146,159 divorces nationwide.
- In the year 2023, there were 147,337 divorces nationwide.
These cumulative figures clearly indicate that the divorce rate among Thais has been increasing every year. Over the past three years, more than 404,438 Thai couples have parted ways, a significantly alarming number.
This aligns with the next topic that Bangkok Matching will discuss. That is, the six essential components in a relationship apart from love, aimed at sustaining and nurturing long-lasting love.
Because love alone is not enough to maintain a strong relationship, there must be six essential elements.
Love encompasses both sweetness and pain. While falling in love may be easy, sustaining it is challenging. Besides love, what else is necessary for a relationship to thrive? Bangkok Matching explains the following points:
1 Honesty and Loyalty: Loyalty, or what we call honesty, is crucial in a relationship and is equally important as love. Love is built on a foundation of trust. Both parties must offer sincere loyalty to each other, avoiding actions that may breed suspicion or jealousy. Honesty fosters a healthy relationship, ensuring its longevity. Lack of trust can ultimately lead to the demise of love.
2 Respect and Understanding: Couples don’t need to be identical in every aspect of life. They don’t need to share the same lifestyle or preferences entirely because differences are inevitable. However, the most crucial aspect is to respect and understand each other’s individuality. Avoid judging or belittling your partner. Respecting and understanding their essence without comparison is essential. Negative remarks can erode trust and respect in a relationship.
3 Empathy: Love must come with empathy. Without empathy, love becomes brittle. Initially, partners may tolerate each other’s lack of understanding, but over time, the absence of empathy can lead to emotional disconnect. Feeling understood and empathized with is crucial for a lasting connection.
4 Space: Allowing each other space strengthens love. Research by Dr. Terri Orbuch, author of “Finding Love Again: 6 Simple Steps” confirms that allocating space in a relationship contributes to its longevity. When one partner feels suffocated, it can lead to feelings of resentment. Having space allows for reflection and personal growth, enhancing the relationship.
5 Support: Besides verbal expressions of love, actions that show support and encouragement are vital. Creating a safe space for each other fosters emotional intimacy and solidifies the bond. Being a reliable supporter during challenging times strengthens the relationship.
6 Responsibility: Individuals play multiple roles and responsibilities in life. Understanding and fulfilling these roles contribute to a strong relationship. Knowing and executing one’s responsibilities lightens the burden on the other partner, creating a sense of balance and stability in the relationship.
By incorporating these six elements into your relationship, you can strengthen the bond and ensure its endurance.
Research indicates that these two factors undermine couple life:
Additionally, Bangkok Matching has found intriguing results from a survey conducted by the Institute of Behavioral Science, Srinakharinwirot University, analyzing the unmarried couple’s lifestyles. This analysis enables Bangkok Matching to discern easily understandable conflict characteristics in relationships, including inappropriate communication, emotional engagement, and problem avoidance.
1 Inappropriate Communication:
While couples recognize that communication is vital for understanding and problem-solving, they often fail to listen and acknowledge each other. One partner may seek truth while the other avoids it, resorting to silence, evasion, or defensive tactics. Consequently, conversations deteriorate into hostility, with both parties resorting to unproductive communication methods to express dissatisfaction, such as giving each other the silent treatment, stonewalling, or resorting to ridicule. These conflict dynamics lead to strained relationships, ultimately leading to their demise.
2 Letting Emotions Override Reason:
In this aspect, the surveyed couples revealed that misunderstandings often lead to emotional involvement, where one tends to become angry when their needs are not met or when their partner’s actions negatively impact them emotionally. This often results in negative behaviors such as sulking, cursing, raising one’s voice, seeking dominance, or resorting to physical violence. When couples are engulfed in anger and unable to communicate rationally, it fosters a continuous sense of dissatisfaction in the relationship.
If you’ve reached the end of your relationship, try the above life-saving technique from Bangkok Matching matchmaking agency.
For couples who feel they can’t change and have tried everything but still can’t get along, consider using the technique to revive the relationship and restore understanding. It’s simple but often overlooked: review the problems from the beginning until now. It involves simple steps but requires openness, putting aside prejudices, and self-reflection. Just holding onto it won’t improve the relationship; in fact, repeated reluctance might worsen it due to ego.
Reflect back on the good times when the relationship was thriving, and there were no issues. Recall the feelings during those times, bringing back the emotions when your partner whispered sweet words in your ear or your heart raced when you first touched. If you still have those feelings, you can move on to the next step.
Express gratitude, even if it’s difficult, and you don’t feel like thanking someone because you don’t think you did anything wrong. Consider the good things, the help your partner provided, or the kindness they showed you, whether big or small. Express gratitude through words or write them down.
If you’ve passed the above two steps, Bangkok Matching believes your ego has greatly diminished. Next is to communicate, share your feelings about the problems you’ve felt, and find solutions together. Some couples may resolve it through conversation alone, while others may need advice from therapists or experts.
Because when relationships falter, creating uncertainty and insecurity, it affects the feelings of those involved. Furthermore, relationships are delicate; no one can provide the right answers except yourself. Therefore, these guidelines and tips are just starting points to support a relationship on the brink of collapse, but whether it can be revived depends on you and your partner alone.
For those seeking a dating partner or life companion with aligned attitudes, good status, and profiles, don’t forget to consider a reliable assistant like Bangkok Matching, Thailand’s longest running high-end matchmaking and dating company. We have professional matchmakers with extensive experience ready to provide profile matching and thoughtful guidance like relationship guides, ensuring you have the best love experience.